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Archive for 5 May 2009

Nothing to Lose

As many of you know, our family spent several years as missionaries in Youth With A Mission (YWAM).  You may also be aware that YWAM missionaries must raise 100% of their financial support, including the rent they pay to live on the YWAM campus, for those who choose to do so.  For those unfamiliar with the practicalities of this arrangement, it means that you share your vision for ministry with individuals, family members, and churches who may want to partner with you to accomplish the vision.  Those who choose to “support” you, send money on a “regular” basis.  However, from month to month, supporters drop out, churches alter their budgets, supporters forget for months at a time…you NEVER know how much income you will have in any given month.  Sometimes, the missionary is surprised by a large ‘one-time’ gift that covers the shortage from deficiencies created as other supporters couldn’t come through for them.  (We were blessed to experience God’s provision this way MANY times during our years in missions.)

“YWAMers”, as we commonly refer to ourselves, often - very wrongly - refer to this lifestyle of living on financial support as “living by faith”.  Okay, they’re not 100% wrong…it is living by faith, but the tacit belief that those “in the real/secular world” (a.k.a. “living a normal life”) are not living by faith is, without a doubt, 100% wrong.  In fact, I’ve found it more challenging to my faith to live on a salary than I found it to live “on support”.  Lately, that challenge has grown significantly and I’ve been trying to understand exactly why.  I think I’ve finally figured it out…okay, to be honest, God has finally gotten something through my thick skull.

When we were on the mission field, we were renting an apartment, and the sum of our possessions were a computer, some clothes, a car (our first one was purchased for $500…remember, we were in SWEDEN, not a third-world country where $500 is the average annual income!), and a few other odds and ends.  Our challenge each month was to pay all of our bills and come up with enough money for plane tickets, when necessary.  We were blessed that we never went into debt for anything during our time on the field, thanks to God and the generosity of those He led to support us.  To each of them, we are eternally grateful.  NOW, however, we have a decent car, lease a 2nd car, “own” a house (we share ownership with the bank, anyway), have some furniture, and so on.  We don’t have a lot, but we have enough that I prefer (rather strongly) not to lose it!

So, what did I learn?  I have come to the realization that a) I STILL don’t have anything of consequence to lose, relative to the value of my relationship with God and the blessing that comes in that relationship, regardless of the challenges one must face in order for it to grow and b) to my shame, I wasn’t actually exercising much faith at all while in missions, because I didn’t have much on the line and, therefore, I wasn’t pressured by the fear of losing anything.

I’m grateful for these lessons.  They certainly don’t come cheap, but they’re worth every penny.

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